When we listen to the answer to a question we have posted we are listening for:-

• What is being said: content, words used or not used, the way the words are used
• How it said: emphasis on words, tone of voice
• Body language: how they are sitting, what their posture is telling us

Body langauge is key when listening to people. It is easy to convey that you are open and listening to their ideas by the way you are sat/stood and if you are making eye contact with them. If you are distracted, look disinterested or not making eye contact it can make them feel like you are not listening and can disrupt the coaching session.

 

When we summarise what someone has said we are reducing what has been said to key points, usually using the same words that the person has used. For example, "there are essentially 3 things you said you are going to try..."

It is useful to summarise intermittently during a coaching interaction because:-

• It gives you a change to reflect back to the coachee what you have understood from what has been said
• It reassures the coachee that they have been fully heard and understood
• It gives the coachee a chance to hear what they said repeated back to them so they can check how their communication has been heard so they can adjust if it wasn't what they meant